Sunday, April 17, 2011

spring break

By the time Christmas break over, i remembered seeing myself ready for the second semester of my junior year. New year, although some dispute broke out without any expectation, I always believe God's providences in my life. But, wait a second, i never thought that the challenges will be endless up to spring break which is now (the very moment i type this)

Straight from the first day I wore my batik uniform on the second semester up to yesterday, yes, April 16th 2011, school life is deadly hectic. Amid every single school demanded stuffs like journals and test, i always have my responsibility for the performing arts department. ask me, my work is basically a backstage duties. i need to administer attendance, take care of the stage managers, the props, the sounds, the cast and the crew and obviously the director, himself. Being on time for the rehearsal is like an ultimatum for me. making my face so pissed off my late comers and entitled the mean one, okey i got that. praise the Lord, out of all rehearsals, i only missed one. yes, one which is the last rehearsal before spring break. why? got my low blood pressure, if i force myself running here and there catching people for their turn, still focus on the script, still on the music, still on the backstage, i will faint in no time. believe me.

the sports day, my very loveling blue team. I thank Thee for sending me blue as part of my heart. literally a lifetime experience. no, we didn't get the first place. The two months with the team is just priceless. The kiddos are too adorable like naomi,kaira,thea,eunike,nicole,joshua,joel,sam,ben,vincent and everyone. the high schoolers especially the sophomore really did their awesome support for me and John as the leaders. the teachers and parents always support us :') every single time i fail to make this team to get that trophy, i always remind myself: at the end of the day, people will not remember which team win this year or the next year but they will remember whether their team during school year is a fun team or just a boring autocratic leaders that lead team to doomed two months.

school marks, okey i can't really make a crap about this but it is not that okey. i have been working with the new time management this past four months. since i almost hit msa everyday for the preliminary rounds and home after six, i allow myself to review everything only until twelve midnight. thats it. i will wake up again by four in the morning, with all the sleepyhead and mind, hit the books again. as the result? panda eyes all the way! but i can say, it works way more effective rather than forcing myself staying late up to 2AM with tons of biology terms i need to put in my head. doomed. i have around two weeks of school really to pull every single of my falling marks UP! seriously, if i can be so ambitious for sports day with the team, hello! as an individual now, i will regain my golden scores.

as for my spiritual life with Him. i told you in my new year post, this is the year of multiplication for those who respond to the challenges, rightly. i remember during the final for futsal competition both above and below fourteen for blue team. we lost. i put my very maximum expectations for my team and they lost. I don't get mad nor curse them but i feel like failing by my won unable to bring them to get the trophy. here comes the super perfectionist nature attack. *slap myself by heart* blame my own. panic, like really panic on what to do. as if there is no hopes for tomorrow, in addition that my school works for Thursday is not that done yet. I called my mom and text a. well, basically they are telling me to stop being panic and blame myself like this because it is all a waste of time. a challenged me to say words of grateful instead of blaming myself. unbelievably, today's sermon just confirmed what mom and a have been telling me. stay calm in the midst of problems. God has the perfect control of our life. when we go panic, we are saying to Him, "God, i have no Faith in You, i don't believe in Your plans." What if Faith without challenges? it requires action, hello!

without the challenges within the futsal match, i tell you, i wont be able to end the race strongly yesterday. my team lost if we measure it through score. i am all dumbo not able to lead this team to victory, again be grateful is all i can do to Him. it is all about the individual victory against myself whether i have work my best or not and yes, i have. i cried last year when Yellow got the second place but this year, i smile. i have no idea how can i make this, imagine the perfectionist me doing this! hah. thank you, Lord. now, i can enjoy my spring break. let the spring's magic be sprinkled!



with a pixie spring dust of ♥,
-Michelly Ramli